Dear Bob ...
My boss is driving me nuts. She gives me assignments; then, at the first sign of a problem she jumps in, takes over, and fixes whatever it is. Then she tells me to take it from there, with an attitude that tells me she's annoyed at having had to jump in and that she expects me to be grateful for the help.
I don't want her help. If I did, I'd ask for it. I want her to let me do the job she assigned to me.
[ Find out what Bob has to say when the tables are turned: "When you've set the pattern with an employee, you've got to be tough to change it" | Get sage IT career advice from Bob Lewis' Advice Line newsletter. ]
Did I mention that "first sign of a problem" means "first sign I'm not doing the job the way she'd do it"?
I've tried to broach the subject with her, but she brushed me off without any sign she thinks there's any validity to my complaint, so I've given up.
What should I do? Live with the problem? Or do you have a better way for me to get her to stop micromanaging?
- Smothered
Dear Smothered ...
Before answering your question, let me first help you get inside your manager's head. Maybe it will help.
Most micromanagers I've met aren't driven by the need to control. They're perfectionists, and perfectionists feel tremendous stress when they see anything out of place. They have a strong sense of how the world should be, and when it isn't that way, they almost literally can't stand it -- they have to fix it. It's a compulsion.
My guess is that this is what you're dealing with. Start with empathy, not irritation, because Earth is a very difficult place for a perfectionist to inhabit.
Next: Here's why your manager isn't interested in your suggestions as to how she should manage better: From her perspective, you aren't even succeeding at your own job, which makes any suggestion you have for her presumptuous. You aren't who she looks to for advice on how to improve, and why would she?
(And to be fair: We're all experts in how everyone other than ourselves can do their jobs better. If you don't believe me, watch members of the chattering class on CNN and Fox News or read them on the editorial page. They all know better than any member of any administration exactly how they should fix what's wrong with the world. But I digress.)
So ... what do you do? I think the answer is this: The next time your manager jumps in, fixes something for you, and jumps out again, thank her for the help before you do anything else. If you acknowledge the value of her expertise and experience, you'll have a much better chance of redirecting it.
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