Apple to Samsung: Sorry you're not as cool as we are

Apple's bogus apology to Samsung about its alleged copying of the iPad isn't cutting it with the British courts -- nor should it

Remember that treacly catchphrase from the 1970s, "Love means never having to say you're sorry"? Deep down, Apple must truly love Samsung, because it just can't bring itself to properly apologize to the South Korean electronics giant.

Last July, a U.K. judge ordered Apple to apologize, in public, for claiming that Samsung had stolen the design of the iPad for its Galaxy tablet. Among Judge Colin Birss' more notable conclusions was that Galaxy tablets "do not have the same understated and extreme simplicity which is possessed by the Apple design. They are not as cool."

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Apple was required to buy ads in five U.K. newspapers and to post a notice on its website stating that Samsung did not copy its designs. Apple appealed that ruling and lost.

So last week Apple complied -- or reluctantly pretended to comply -- by buying one terse newspaper ad and offering a teensy link at the bottom of its U.K. home page to a six-paragraph statement that was, shall we say, less than apologetic.

I'll let The Register's Anna Leach describe it for you, since that snarky U.K. tech rag has been having quite a bit of fun with the whole topic.

The statement can be found via a small link labeled "Samsung/Apple UK judgment" on Apple's UK homepage, and is a mealy mouthed six-paragraph account of the litigation over Apple's registered design....

Two paragraphs acknowledge the court ruling, and four are devoted to digs at Samsung. It includes quotes from the judge saying that Samsung's fondleslab is "not as cool" as the iPad, and ends with a self-righteous declaration that courts in other countries have decided differently...

Judge Jacob, dismissing Apple's appeal against Birss' initial ruling, specified a font and font-size - Arial, size 14 - for the print version of the statement to appear in UK newspapers, but web visitors may have a harder time finding Apple's non-apology on the UK homepage. Even with a high-resolution Retina screen bringing every detail on the page to "resolutionary" glory, it's still a small link.

That Register story, titled "APPLE: SCREW YOU BRITS, everyone else says Samsung copied us," was introduced as evidence in court a few days later by Samsung. As a result, a three-judge panel at the U.K. Court of Appeals ruled that Apple must apologize again -- and this time they have to act like they really mean it.

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