Google Glass: Only real men need apply

Ready for Google Glass? Better check your testosterone levels first. While you're at it, see if you pass Cringely's tech wimp test

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Working from home is for wimps

Also emasculating: Working from home. Admit it, you know the only reason people work from home is so they can wear a dress all day and/or go full commando. No wonder FedEx refuses to come to the door any more.

Telecommuting is for wimps. You know what's not for wimps? Spending two hours each day crawling through rush-hour traffic or packed like sardines in a commuter train with a bunch of strangers who smell like offal. What else puts hair on your chest: Drinking day-old coffee that tastes like battery acid, eating junk food out of a hallway vending machine, and arguing about the size and location of your cubicle. Real he-men and she-men are happy to waste endless hours in meetings where only one person ever talks and everyone else stares out into middle space with eyes like dead fish.

That's manly. No wonder Marissa Mayer is such a fan.

Emasculating: Using a store-bought operating system like Windows or Mac OS.

Manly: Coding your own OS from scratch using your own fork of Yellow Dog Linux. Then documenting every single g-ddamned line. In Sanskrit.

I could go on, but you get the point. It's not enough to be using the best technology or the smartest, fastest, cheapest devices. You must also choose the tech that makes you look most like a testosterone-fueled knuckle-dragging brute.

You know, like Sergey.

What technology makes you feel fresh and feminine? Share your secrets below or email me:

This article, "Google Glass: Only real men need apply," was originally published at Follow the crazy twists and turns of the tech industry with Robert X. Cringely's Notes from the Field blog, and subscribe to Cringely's Notes from the Underground newsletter.

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